Haryanavi humour and jokes*
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A sophisticated city person comes to Haryana. He has this mistaken notion that rural people are simple and can be made fools of easily. He asks lift from a Sikh farmer on bullock cart, saying "O paaji, sanu Singapore jana hega, twadi belgaddi le chalugi menu otthon?" Farmer says, "Oye aaja, be jaa". Hearing this, the city person is momentarily shocked and asks "Ketthon beyaan?" The farmer replies, "Ae majh diyan donaa singhaan utte be jaa, appe hi Singapore ponch javega!!" Note: The above joke has been sent to us by Sh Mukesh Purohit on 11th July, 2004 |
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Ek pheri nu hoya ke ek cycle walle ne ek budhiya mein cycle bhida di. Budhiya bolli, "Re oot tu itni badi badi mooch ley rya se, tanne sharam ni aundhi mere takkar mar di?" Cycle walla chora bolya, "Kyun tai moochhan mein ke brake laag ri se?" |
Teli aur jat ki is baat pe kaha suni ho gayi ke kaun ghana syana se. Dona ke beech shayari ka muqabla ho gaya. Pehelan teli ki baari thi. Usne sunaya, "Jat re jat, tere sar pe khat."
Jat ne apna dimag top gear main thok diya aur bolya, "Teli re teli, tere sir pe kohlu." Teli bolya, "Arre jat ya to koi baat nahi bani." Jat bolya, "Na banne, sasurre bojh taley to dab ke marega." |
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One Sikh farmer to another - Jatt teri matt mari gayi, |
Ek pheri ek Maruti alle ne truck mein peechey se dey mari, aur truck ke nichey bud gaya. Truck driver khidki se sir kadhke bolya,
"Arre bhai choongh li ho to bahar likkad le." |
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Akhbaar wala ek haryanavi filmon ke hero ka interview leve tha. Uste poochan lagya, "Jungle mein thaare aage sher aaje to tum ke karoge?" Hero bolya, "Arre manne ke karna se, pher to jo bhi karega woh to susra sher he karega!" |
Ek tau bus conductor se boojhan lagya, "Re bhai manne Rohtak jana, ya bus kitt jaegi?"
O bolya, "Dilli jagi". Tau pher bolya, "Per is board pe to Rohtak likh rakhya se." Conductor bolya, "Tau nu kar, tu isse board pe baeth ke bug ja pher." |
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Ek mota sa seth ka chhora doosre chhore ke uppar chaddha bethya aur usney dhad dhad chhetan lag raya aur saath mein jor jor sey ron lagryatha. Rah chalde admi ne bujya,
"Re seth chhetan to tu isney lagrya pher rovey kyun hai?" Seth bolya, "Main is khattar ron lagrya ke jeeb main uthunga to pher ke hovega." |
Ek jat doosre jat sey, "Arre tanney bera ke Hanuman bhi jat tha?" Doosra bolya, " Tanne kyunkar bera patya?" Pehley alla bolya, "Lugai to ram ki kho gayi thi aur aag Hanuman ne apni poonch mein lagwa li! Jat ke bagair aur koi issa kam kar sakk hai?" |
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Mandir mein ek aadmi, Ram ki moorti ke aage jor jor se ron laag rya tha. Saath khade Tau ne poochya, "Re bhai ke baat se, kyon itta rove se?"
Voh aadmi bolya "Meri lugai ghar chhod ke bhaaj gayi." Tau bolya, "To bawli booch iske aage ke tesu bahan lag rya. Iski to khud kho gii thi, Hanuman ke pass ja, wohe toh ke laya tha!" |
Ek shehri babu ek gaon ke mollad se rasta bujhan lagya.
Mollad bolya, "Nu kar tu yahan te khabhe ne ho liye aur aage jakke sajje ne." Babu bolya, "Bhai sahab mein ap se aap aap karkey baat kar raha hun aur aap mujjey tu tu bool rahey ho. Mollad bollya, "Pher ke tanne bapu bolun?" |
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Ek baar ek shayri sunan lagya, "Tum uss chilmen sai jahanko, tum uss chilmen sai jhanko, tum uss chilmen sai, jahanko"
Ek bola, "Aagai" Shayar faer bola, "Tum iss chilmen sai jhanko, mein iss chilmen sai jhankoon, tum uss chilmen sai jhanko mein iss chilmen sai jhankoon" Pachai bathaya aadme dukhi ho leya, ar bola ke, "La duo aag iss chilmen main, naa tum jhanko na mein jahankoo!" |
Ek bhai saadi te bahut dara kare thaa. Ek bai gaam mein thanedar aaga us din us bhai ki bhans kise ki juwar kha gi. Ghana ulahana aa ya. To uske ghar wale bole, "Thanedar sahab isne dara ke ne saadi tahi tyar kara do yo saadi te bahut dare se."
Thanedar ne us bhai ko dara dhamka ke bola, "Teri yehi saza hai ke tere ko saadi karni padegi." Bhai usne darte ne saadi ki haan kar li. Saadi mein jab dulhan ko uske paas laya gaya to wo bola, "E bebe teri bhans ne bhi kise ki juwar kha li thee ke?" |
The above jokes are compiled by Randeep Lather
If you have Haryanavi jokes to share with us, please mail them to webmaster@haryana-online.com
*Important Notice: Please note that the above jokes are only meant to depict the outspoken and earthy nature of Haryanavi humor. There is no deliberate attempt to poke fun at any religion, religious practice, caste, creed or person.
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